screaming/drunk/disorderly

sitting between friends, laughing at their drunken antics as the music is slowly ruining your ears, watching the people stumble around... the steady beat is replaced by a slower one - everyone drifts to the chairs that line the edges of the room and they proceed to fill the air with more smoke and kill a few more brain cells. the laughter has not died and the level of noise has not decreased... you are suddenly hit with the reality of the situation at hand. your lungs will hate you in the morning for breathing in this terrible atmosphere. your stomach will laugh as you lie in bed regretting every sip. your head will ache and your throat will be sore. joining the crowd once again... couples are sharing kisses and exchanging professions of love in dark corners. maybe lies and maybe truth... in here a lot stands in the way of making that decision. your own significant other leans your way and the scent of alcohol on their breath catches your attention. smiles lead to laughing and laughter leads to serious conversations involving life. emotions change with each drop that touches your lips and their lips and no final decisions can be made concerning anything. later it is learned that frequently checking the time will not make it fly by any faster... yet soon enough the laughter fades and the cheery faces turn to solemn stares directed toward nothing. drinks lose their taste, the smoke in the air gets heavier by the second, music seems distant and dull. an awkward silence is followed by a procession of dragging feet and blood-shot eyes through the door and to the vehicles in which they arrived at this decadent place. you have looked forward to leaving and now you are dreading the drive. cars full of sleeping passengers and weary drivers disappear one by one ahead of you as you grip the wheel tightly to help you stay awake. making it home with no scratches or bumps or evidence of what you have been up to forces a sigh of relief from your mouth. parking the car and opening the door to inhale what seems like the freshest of air revives you enough to help the others from the backseat to their beds. they all get tucked in and you think back on the evening... was the pleasure worth the pain? this lifestyle is not yours. it is one into which you have fallen quite by accident... you are terrified of what might be found at the bottom of this hole, but the sense of fear is perfectly balanced with a sense of mystery and a desire to know more.